A Mother’s Rule of Life (Our Daily Schedule & Routines)

If you are a mom, you probably feel like you have literally no time to do anything…ever. And if you have a spare moment you don’t even know where to begin. Also, if you are anything like me, you may be constantly wondering what the point of all of this is and does it even matter if you try since no one will notice and it will just get ruined by sticky hands? And that there’s no point in trying to pray if you just get interrupted anyways? And maybe you have given up on reading, showering, working out or hanging out with your husband because you are just too tired and don’t have time or energy? Just me? Okay… but seriously. Being a mom is hard and I am always on the search to find out how I can seek the joy in motherhood and reduce friction in my day and life so that I can be more present, less cranky and really embrace the joy and choose to encounter Jesus.

Enter: A Mother’s Rule of Life by Holly Pierlot. It has basically become my mom bible to mentor me into enjoying and thriving in my Vocation. The subtitle for A Mother’s Rule of Life is “How to bring order to your home and peace to your soul”. I’m pretty sure if you’re a mom you’re probably thinking in your head, “sign me up!!!” And if you’re not feeling like you need peace and order and are living in a state of complete bliss, I am very happy for you and would love some tips.

In A Mother’s Rule of Life, Holly starts by talking about her journey through motherhood, her breaking point and what she decided to do about it. She decides to create this thing called a “Rule of Life” for her family. Used mostly in religious communities, it is a tool for ordering your Vocation. It is a consistent schedule that makes time for all of the things that are important to your vocation. She shares the Missionaries of Charity’s Rule and then basically alters it to be fitting for her Vocation as a wife and mother. Essentially, the end goal of the book is for you to create one of these rules for your family, too.

Holly basically walks you through five roles, or priorities, that you have in your Vocation: Prayer, Person, Partner, Parent and Provider. She talks about how it is important that those priorities come in that order, and that our days should reflect that order. She walks you through some beautiful advice, theology, and practical tips on each topic, and then walks you through how you can write your own rule of life for your family so that you are able to do all of those things well. She really speaks to your soul as a mother in the messiness of it all, but also calls you higher. The pages are full of encouragement and motivation in motherhood and she really convicts you of the dignity of your work in the home.

The hidden life is a really beautiful one, but brings so many challenges and you can so easily get your priorities out of wack and just fall into a crazy downward spiral of what-am-I-doing-with-my-life-there-is-no-point-in-trying-I-cannot-do-this-we-are-going-to-just-watch-dinosaur-train-all-day-I-give-up mindset. (I promise I still have those days) Satan knows that mothers are so beautiful and so important that he constantly messes with us and tells us that we are unimportant, not capable, too tired, too overwhelmed, not enough this or that…the list goes on. Stop listening to that crap right now and let’s turn our eyes to Jesus and do this thing! So take a deep breath, pray, “Come, Holy Spirit” and keep reading.

I highly recommend you read this book before trying to write out your own schedule/ Rule of Life. If you want to checkout a free digital copy while you wait for it to come in the mail, Formed.org offers it for free! I do not want you to get overwhelmed by starting with the what and the how and forgetting that it is the why that matters. This book makes you convicted of the why and helps your heart be rightly ordered before beginning and just getting overwhelmed with the details.

You can find the book on Amazon here:

Now, I am going to share our Rule of Life (at least what it is right now in this season) and some templates and reflection questions for you to write one along with the book, too! It is always so so helpful for me to hear what other moms do with their life and their days so I hope this is helpful for you and gives you some ideas.

First, before you read our schedule, it is important to mention that I have a baby and a toddler. Meaning their needs and my needs will constantly be changing in these early years. Right now, Noah takes a morning and afternoon nap. Soon he will be dropping it and we will have to reassess what type of routine will work for us then. Life always changes and everyones needs and schedules will be VERY different. But for me in this season, in my state of life, this Rule of Life has been so helpful to me and my family to have a predictable routine that ensures I get everything that I want to get done, done.

It is also important to mention that this is an ideal day for us. Sometimes we don’t make it to Mass or the Gym or we want to throw in the towel on naps and enjoy a morning at The Zoo or drive to see a friend. This is just an outline that we keep on our fridge and follow on most days to keep a predictable routine for our family. That way, when we have crazy days or go to do something extra special, it is not a stressor because we know that we will fall back into our routine the majority of the time and the laundry will happen, I will get my workout in, etc. Blocking time for me as a mom of littles allows my brain to not worry about when I am going to get everything done, because I know that I don’t have to finish that thing right now because I will have time to finish it later. A routine is freeing for me and allows me to be present to the moment I am in and the task at hand.

Here’s our example:

In the book, Holly also recommends outlining your weekly routines as well. Here is ours:

To help you get started brainstorming and writing your own rule of life for you and your family, I have made some planning sheets that you can download here:

I also offer a Customizable Family Binder with all of these sheets and more available to be edited and printed over on my Etsy Shop. Click here to check it out!

There is SO much I would love to say about this book. I really don’t even know where to begin. I want to do a whole rundown of each chapter and how it has changed me! However, this post would be way too long and I know people also just want the practicals. Please comment on this post if you are interested in a series or book club diving deeper into this book together! I would love to re-read it and be re-convicted of the dignity of my vocation and how I can offer it as something beautiful for God.

I also have so much to say on the breakdown of our rule and the why behind each part of it. Stay tuned for a breakdown as well as our cleaning schedule I will share. There are so many little things and habits that make this rule possible to stick to that I would love to share in hopes that it gives you encouragement and hope that you can dive into your own rule as well!

Thanks for reading, I am praying for all of you!

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